"There shall be no censoring! want no censoring! What and how did you feel?"But when the client start to tell...
And sensitive clients probably also senses and feels pretty soon what's "legitimate" or "opportune" to say, and how to say it to each particular therapist. Have developed such a radar?? And can get even more scared, than the opposite, for her/his feelings?? Because they sense (often unconsciously) the therapists fears for genuine emotions? And develop such a fear for her/his emotions that... Yes, what?
Yes, childhood blindness becomes even more cemented than ever before? It's like this too often, than the opposite? Clients are learned to blame themselves, thus a defence is actually strengthened!?? The Primary Defence, which the child resorted to at first, i.e., to blame her/himself for what she/he experienced endured! ut this feeling is so painful, so then the child turned to other defences: the false hope for instance;
"If I just... then..."The false belief that she/he could change the conditions, circumstances and even te people she/he was dependent on!?
Or to False power denial of needs: a false feeling of power that he/she didn't need this and that, and if she/he didn't need the things it didn't get (but what a child actually needs) the child got a false feeling she/he handled the situation, wasn't hurt.
Or false power anger, by reacting with anger he/she got a feeling of strength and control...
And we go on resorting to these defences (there are probably other defences, or variations of them?) as adults, when we encounter difficult situations (of different severity). These mechanisms can be triggered by events in the persent as adults, and this aways causes problems, with handling things constructively... And this is by no means strange! And nothing we should blame ourselves for, or being blamed for, least from helpers!! Guilt feelings for our badness our faults etc. are too many times strengthened instead of the opposite?? And because of early experiences we doesn't immediately see this through either. The more harmed the more difficult this is!
Hasn't there been a backlash in therapy too? To a more authoritarian way of behaving and resonating??
I am very ironical, and critical...
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